FLASHBACKS

FLASHBACKS
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I believe that you and you alone hold the power over what makes you happy. If something in your life does not make you happy, then CHANGE IT! Find your HAPPY, so that you can share it with the people that you love. Don't waste time, the little things that you do, and the manner in which you choose to do them really DO matter. I believe that giggles have magical powers! So, please add GET the GIGGLES to your TO DO LIST!

Marta, just being me...

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Sunday, September 12, 2010

*❤* Mothers- please talk to your Daughters *❤*

There are not many things in this world that are more powerful than a  Mother's love.  I am blessed to be a mom and to have a beautiful teenage daughter that is able to share her emotions and communicate with me.  That was my #1 goal in raising her - I wanted her to KNOW that I was her SAFE PLACE.  I mean, if a girl can't trust her mother, then her entire world will be unbalanced.


I get my heart broken time and time again as her awesome friends come to spend the night and we "chat" for a bit... (she actually lets me do that).  Every now and then I will allow them to ask me questions-- and they don't even have to look at me...  I do it so that they can have REAL ANSWERS - because it is terrifying what they think and believe to be true.  I also get a quick reality check and gage as to where they are by the types of questions that they ask! 


I- for one - DID NOT FORGET what it felt like to be a teenage girl.  There are so many girls out there that do not tell their mothers anything!  I mean their mom's have NO CLUE what these girls do, where they go, etc.  How scary is that!?!?  Girls have gotten SO much meaner and have more weapons in which to "hurt" eachother with... I wish that they could see ahead 20 years ... go to a reuion and hear some stories... Some women carry these 'girl' scars for a long long time!  The girls of today would mature into healthier, more powerful women if they could detox the drama early on!


I try so hard to teach the "get off the porch" lesson to anyone who will listen.  Whenever people are focussing on YOU, then try not to react.  Hold on to your power- do not give it away to a group of drama launchers!   It is easy to picture it as if you are standing on your front porch and a group of kids are pelting you with water balloons.  They will keep launching balloons as long as you keep standing there and are a fun target-- even better if you scream,  cry and jump up and down!  It is YOUR CHOICE-- when you are tired of getting wet, then go inside and shut the door. (ie: logoff facebook, turn off your cell phone, etc.)  It isn't very much fun to throw balloons at an empty porch (an unavailable target)...  and pretty soon, someone else will come outside!  (just make sure that YOU do not join the throwers)!


The times when your teenager pushes you away are the times when she needs you there the most!  Just be her safe place,  make it OK to talk, OK to feel the feelings that she feels, and validate her journey.  You can't walk the path for her, but you can help her to find some pretty cool spots along the way!  No one is perfect and we all know that there is not a manual of how to do this correctly!  Just share the lessons that you've learned the hard way, and remember that giggles can help mend almost anything...   


I LOVE my MOM.  I LOVE being a MOM.  I LOVE my Daughter.  I LOVE my FRIENDS that help me keep my mom wits and giggles!

PS:  This goes for BOYS too *❤* I only have sisters and a daughter, so my "expertise" are a bit girlie =0)