We are so much nicer to random strangers than we are to the people that we live with and love everyday. That is just silly.
You may have heard this and I'm sure you already know it - but isn't it worth repeating time and time again, until we find the way to change it? Let's say you are having just a rotten to the core kind of day: Hey it happens.
We tend to lash out at our families. It is that "unconditional love-- safety zone syndrome" like when you pick up your toddler from daycare-- and your provider tells you, "Oh you have such an angel!" Then you get home or heaven forbid you stop at the store.. and WHOA-- who's kid is THIS?? Temper tantrum worthy of an episode of "Super Nanny". It is because he/she had to be good ALL day and is now safe with Mommy (or Daddy) and can let it all go without risking exile.
I think that it is the same thing when we are out in public; we smile, hold the door and make NICEY NICE with complete strangers 10 minutes after ripping the faces off of our family members at the breakfast table. SO RIDICULOUS -- Don't you agree??
I wish there was a switch that could stop people from doing this. No one enjoys hurting the ones that they love (one would like to think...) It is a CHOICE and one that each of us OWNS. We CAN actually stop ourselves from spitting venom at the pretty familiar faces! Use that polite public diplomacy and stop the cycle. You know the cycle-- the one where people in the neighborhood say "Oh he/she is the nicest, sweetest person!" All the while his/her spouse/kids are rolling their eyes choking back their sarcastic response of, "Oh yea, you don't LIVE with him/her!"
Breaking that cycle sure would reduce those hard to swallow (or non-existent) 'I'm Sorries'! This is just a snack to think about next time one of those MANIC MONDAYS rolls your way! I always tell my daughter to try not to worry so much what others think or say--- If you don't love someone, then they can't really hurt you. (Lesson from dealing with the retail public.) I have her look in the mirror at the reflection of the person who's opinion matters the most! That is also the person that she must learn to LOVE first - (unconditionally) before she can truly love others. (Of course as I am teaching this lesson, I note that my reflection is also in that mirror... because MOMMY counts too & will always love and support her!)
You know I can remember ever single mean thing that was ever said to me.... Can't you? I would hate to think that some of those MEAN THINGS have my voice attached to them in the memories of my precious lovies... and I know that they do. Perfection is not something I aim for. Redemption through paying it forward and teaching others the lessons that I have learned the hard way seems to help me find great joy and peace of mind.
Be nice at HOME first, those are the hearts that COUNT!
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